Just went through all the names of God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. Though it was a meaningful exercise in its entirety, I found myself drawn in and moved by one title for the Father in particular – “the One who sees me.”

Of course, this is a truth that I know and have reflected on and taught a lot through the years. It’s one of the Truths that make Psalm 139 so meaningful and impacting to me. But, today, it just stuck out.

God SEES me.  This is so valuable to me. After all, if I’m honest, I love the feeling of being seen. I always have. I remember as a kid loving the feeling of looking up in the stands while playing basketball and knowing that my parents were watching. When they weren’t, I would purposely work harder to do something that would catch their eye. I wanted them to keep their eyes on me. I loved the feeling that came with knowing that they were seeing me. Of course, this usually caused me to mess up. I’d try to do something beyond my abilities, or I wouldn’t be a team player. What started with the desire to be seen ended in wishing I could run away or disappear.

Sadly, there are times in my life and leadership when I find myself doing the same thing with God. You know, trying to do something spectacular to get His attention. In those moments, I’m feeling like He’s not seeing me. And, in those moments, I usually try to do something beyond my ability or outside of my calling. These moments almost always result in regret. But, when it comes to God, these kinds of feelings are always wrong and this kind of behavior is never necessary.

The truth is that I don’t have to do anything spectacular to get God’s attention. God never takes His eyes off me. He SEES me. I never have to feel like my dreams aren’t being realized, or my passion to help more people isn’t coming to fruition because He’s forgotten about me. He hasn’t. He can’t. At all times and in all places, He sees me.  There is never a moment that He loses sight of me. He knows where I am and what I’m doing.

What a relief. I never have to strive to get His attention. My striving needs to be simply to please Him. If I’m faithful in living to please God, He will open all the doors and give me all the opportunities that fit into His will and Kingdom purposes. No matter what does or doesn’t happen, I can always be assured that He hasn’t forgotten or failed me.  And, just as important to remember, He knows what He’s doing.

When I find myself striving for His attention, I have found that there’s a bigger problem. In those cases, my problem is that I don’t trust Him. Or, I am not finding my value in Him seeing me and/or being pleased with me. Or, I don’t care as much about His will and Kingdom as I do my own will and kingdom. Of course, all of these are significant problems. I might as well build me a couple of golden calves like Jeroboam did in 1 Kings 12:25-30.

Lord, when I strive to do something spectacular to “feel seen,” forgive me. Help me to be satisfied striving to please you in whatever role you call me to. If you want me standing behind others who you’re lifting up, help me to be good with that and to stand and support them humbly and graciously. If you want me standing beside others that you’re lifting up, help me to be good with that and to stand and support them humbly and graciously. If you want to lift me up so that I’m standing in front of others, help me to be good with that and to do it humbly and graciously.

Lord, help me to be satisfied with this truth…You see me.

Just curious, can any of you relate?

Gloria RoughleyComment